Monday

~*~ If you are not lovers, serve the lovers ~*~


O people, if you are not lovers, serve the lovers, draw near to the lovers, love the lovers and think well of the lovers! For some rare individuals, love come by way of involuntary compulsion. The True One (Allah azza wa Jall) looks at them and loves them, so He transfers them in one moment from one state to another. He does not want to love them after years but He loves them in one moment, so they love Him out of necessity, without delay, without introduction, not  gradually and without passage of time.


As for the majority of people, love comes by way of choice. The lovers choose Allah in preference to His creatures. They see the blessings that they have as having come from Him, not from anyone else. They recognize His subtle favors, His preparations for them and His rewards for them so they love Him. Then they choose Him in preference to both this world and the hereafter. They give up the things that are prohibited or legally dubious, reduce the use of what is lawful and be satisfied with whatever they already have. They abandon bed and blankets, sleep and rest; 'Their sides shun their beds.' (Qur'an 32:16)

Neither their night is an ordinary night nor their day is an ordinary day. They say: "Our God, we have left everything behind the backs of our hearts and hastened to You so that you might be pleased."
They walk to Him
sometimes on the feet of their hearts,
sometimes on the feet of their innermost beings,
sometimes on the feet of their will,
sometimes on the feet of their spiritual aspiration,
sometimes on the feet of their truthfulness,
sometimes on the feet of their love,
sometimes on the feet of their yearning,
sometimes on the feet of their humility and modesty,
sometimes on the feet of their fear,
sometimes on the feet of their hope;
they do all this in love for Him and longing to meet Him.

O you who ask me, are you of those who love Allah through involuntary compulsion or through choice? If the answer is neither, then be silent and work on correcting your practice of Islam. O you who ask me, if only your practice of Islam and your faith are sound. If only you leave the company of disbelievers and hypocrites today and stay away from them in the future. If only you refrain from attending sessions of  those who associate creatures and means with Allah, those who dispute with the True One, repent and do not approach the treasuries of the kings and their secrets.

O Allah, do not inlclud us among the pretenders, liars and those who are ignorant of You and of the elite of your creatures and give us in this world good and in the hereafter good and protect us from the torment of the fire.



- Shaykh Abdul Qadir al-Jilani
in Jila' al-Khatir
(Purification of the Mind)

Sunday

~*~ Courtship in Islam ~*~

 

The most common questions I get from young people are, "Do Muslims date?" and "If they don't date, how do they decide whom to marry?"

"Dating" as it is currently practiced in much of the world does not exist among Muslims -- where a young man and woman (or boy/girl) are in a one-on-one intimate relationship, spending time together alone, "getting to know each other" in a very deep way before deciding whether that's the person they will marry. Rather, in Islam pre-marital relationships of any kind between members of the opposite sex are forbidden.
The choice of a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions a person will make in his or her lifetime. It should not be taken lightly, nor left to chance or hormones. It should be taken as seriously as any other major decision in life - with prayer, careful investigation, and family involvement.

So in today's world, how do young people manage? First of all, Muslim youth develop very close friendships with their same-sex peers. This "sisterhood" or "brotherhood" that develops when they are young continues throughout their lives. When a young person decides to get married, the following steps often take place:
  • Young person makes du'a (prayer) for Allah to help him or her find the right person.
  •  
  • The family enquires, discusses, and suggests candidates. They consult with each other to narrow down potential prospects. Usually the father or mother approaches the other family to suggest a meeting.

  • Couple agrees to meet in chaperoned, group environment. Umar (r.a) related that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)." (Bukhari/Muslim). The Prophet (peace be upon him) also reportedly said, "Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan (Shaytan) is the third among them." (Tirmidhi). When young people are getting to know each other, being alone together is a temptation toward wrongdoing. At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur'an (24:30-31) to "lower their gaze and guard their modesty...." Islam recognizes that we are human and are given to human weakness, so this rule provides safeguards for our own sake.

  • Family investigates candidate further - talking with friends, family, Islamic leaders, co-workers, etc. to learn about his or her character.

  • Couple prays salat-l-istikhara (prayer for guidance) to seek Allah's help in making a decision.

  • Couple agrees to pursue marriage or part ways. Islam has given this freedom of choice to both young men and women - they cannot be forced into a marriage that they don't want.
This type of focused courtship helps ensure the strength of the marriage, by drawing upon family elders' wisdom and guidance in this important life decision. Family involvement in the choice of a marriage partner helps assure that the choice is based not on romantic notions, but rather on a careful, objective evaluation of the compatibility of the couple. That is why these marriages often prove successful.



By Huda Dodge

Saturday

~*~Infertility in the Qur'an ~*~

The Qur'an is true guidance for all mankind, complete and lacking nothing. It touches on every aspect of life, infertility is on the vast array of topics. The Qur'an teaches in many ways, showing us a glimpse of the lives of others before us is one way. There are two main stories of infertility which we should draw and learn from. The first story is that of Ibrahim s.a.w. and his wife Sara r.a. There are two main accounts of this story, given as follows.

And his wife was standing (there) and she laughed: But we gave her glad tidings of Isaac and after him, of Jacob. She said "Alas for me! Shall I bear a child, seeing I am an old woman, and my husband here, is an old man? That indeed would be a wonderful thing!" They said: "Dost thou wonder at Allah's decree? The grace of Allah and His blessings on you, O ye people of the house! For He is indeed worthy of all praise, full of Glory!" 11:71-73
...And they (angels) gave him (Ibrahim) glad tidings of a son endowed with knowledge. But his wife came forward clamoring, she smote her forehead and said: "A barren old woman!" They said "Even so has thy Lord spoken and He is full of wisdom and knowledge." 51:28-30 

Not much detail is given in the Qur'an concerning the lives of Sara or Hagar. Much of the detail comes to us through the narration of hadith. And Islamic exegesis also rely on Biblical (Old Testament) information about Sara. What we do know from the Qur'an was that Sara was old and barren when Allah blessed her with a child. Exegesis placec her age at about ninety, while Ibrahim was over 100 yrs old. Long before this Sara gave her hand maiden, Hagar, to Ibrahim in marriage so that he may have children. Many women going through infertility can relate to the sense of guilt for "denying" their husbands children. This is a common feeling that is present, as we see with Sarah. 

The story goes that after Hagar conceived she became "haughty" in her ability to have children, and Sarah's inability at that point. From this rose a jealousy in Sara in which she threatened to do harm to Hagar. Nothing came of this threat and evidently the waters were calmed in Ibrahim's household. The family continued to remain together until Ibrahim's command to take Hagar and Ishmael to the valley of Mecca and leave them there. 

We have reference in the Qur'an of Sara striking her face and laughing in the astonishment of being blessed with a pregnancy at 90 yrs of age. It appears Sarah, naturally, had long since given up hopes of conceiving. She had given Hagar to Ibrahim as a way not to deny him and personally accepting the Qadar (fate) that Allah had set for her. In this we can take a lesson from Sara, at some point we must learn to just accept what has been written for us and go on. All too often couples become obsessed with having a child to where it is harmful for themselves. We as Muslims must learn to seek the balance of a healthy striving for pregnancy and knowing when to stop striving. A woman's (or man's) life does not end because they have no children. Sarah, although barren, remained firm in her faith, true to her husband, and a full woman in all senses of the word. 

It was written for Sarah that she would bare a son and live to see her grandchild. It is said she conceived Ishaq on the night when lots of people were destroyed (the angels where on their way there). And she delivered Ishaq on a friday night. 

We should also take notice at the example set by Ibrahim responding to his barren wife. He was not harsh to his wife even though she was unable to conceive. Nor did he abandon her, he stood by his wife as she stood by him. He did not seek out another wife or "right hand possession" to have children, it was Sara who suggested Hagar to him. This bond of marriage, faith, love, and tenderness kept this couple together even in infertile times. Working together in cooperation in the process, something we all should take notice of. And men, or cultures for that matter, who blame women for not conceiving and dumb them as if they were no longer a complete woman should take heed in this example set by Ibrahim. 

Ibrahim was indeed a model... 16:120

Another Qur'anic example of infertility is that of Zakariya and his wife Ishba. The story focuses more on Zakariya than Ishba herself. In fact very little is said about her in the Qur'an, hadith, and exegesis. 

There did Zakariya pray to his Lord, saying: "O my Lord! Grant unto me from Thee a progeny that is pure: for Thou art He that heareth prayer! While he was standing in prayer in the chamber, the angels called unto him: "Allah doth give thee glad tidings of Yahya, witnessing the truth of a Word from Allah, and (be besides) noble, chaste, and a prophet,- of the (goodly) company of the righteous." He said: "O my Lord! How shall I have son, seeing I am very old, and my wife is barren?" "Thus," was the answer, "Doth Allah accomplish what He willeth." 3:38-40 

(This is) a recital of the Mercy of thy Lord to His servant Zakariya.Behold! he cried to his Lord in secret, Praying: "O my Lord! infirm indeed are my bones, and the hair of my head doth glisten with grey: but never am I unblest, O my Lord, in my prayer to Thee! 19:2-4 

And (remember) Zakariya, when he cried to his Lord: "O my Lord! leave me not without offspring, though thou art the best of inheritors." So We listened to him: and We granted him Yahya: We cured his wife's (Barrenness) for him. These (three)were ever quick in emulation in good works; they used to call on Us with love and reverence, and humble themselves before Us. 21:89-90 

Mary r.a. was placed in the care of Zakariya and her aunt Ishba. Ishba was barren, so the caring of a child was a blessing in her family. Zakariya at times marvelling at how well Mary had grown appears to have instilled the urge in him to have a son. One who would not only inherit the family lineage, but one who would carry on the teachings of Allah, something which he did himself. Perhaps Mary r.a. fulfilled the natural urge in Zakariya to have children for a limited time, but when she had matured and no longer a child, the desire seems to have rekindled. Whatever the exact emotions that Zakariya had, he prayed in secret to have a son. 

Zakariya beseeched Allah for this blessing, perhaps not expecting the answer, he appears surprised with it. Perhaps it was not so much the answer of "yes" but rather the means in which the child would come to him. His old barren wife, cured by Allah, was to conceive. Zakariya responded in natural amazement that his wife would conceive. He was told by Allah that such a thing was easy for Allah.. and it is. His son would be given the name of Yahya a name not before given. Ishba and Mary were pregnant during the same time, six months being the difference. The issue of Pregnancy in light of Qur'an will be given more attention at a latter date. 

As with the story of Ibrahim we have the example of a husband who remains with his barren wife. She is not shunned, shammed, divorced, or looked down upon as a incomplete woman. As many men and cultures do to women in present times. This is a lesson that all of our ummah must learn, as Allah says "...He leaves barren whom He wills" (42:50) It is a decree from Allah. This does not make one less of a woman (or man) and one should not be treated as such. We are to remain firm in our faith in Allah, knowing that He brings about things that we may not like, thinks we are tested with. And it appears with the stigma placed on couples who do not have children we are failing our test.
I know many women are thinking, that these two stories have such happy endings (babies) and yet it does not happen with all of us. Why does not Allah bestow on all of us pregnancies.. why must "I" be barren.. why me. As I sit here and write this my mind searches for an example of a woman with no children.. suddenly I remembered one so full of faith.. one which is mentioned in the Qur'an as an example for those who believe
And Allah sets forth, as an example to those who believe the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she said: "O my Lord! Build for me, in nearness to Thee, a mansion in the Garden, and save me from Pharaoh and his doings, and save me from those that do wrong"; 66:11 

Her name was Asya, and she never conceived a child. It is said that her marriage was one of sacrifice she made for the safety of her people. But the marriage was never consumated, for Allah had stricken Pharaoh with impotence. Whatever the case may have been, here was a childless woman, who is set forth as an example for all believers. She nurtured a Prophet from infancy even though he was not her own, and she was a martyr. It is said that Pharoah had killed several believers in the palace, among them a maid, her children and her husband. Asya picked up an iron stake to kill Pharaoh, she failed, and Pharaoh had her tortured by piercing iron stakes through her breast. The same childless woman sought Allah to build mansions in the Garden, and to save her from those that do wrong. Do we dare to say that such an example as stated by Allah is an incomplete or less of a woman because she bore no children? Do we not take heed in the examples given to us? So anytime one attempts to make you feel low, or less of a woman (or man) think of these examples, draw guidance and strength from them. Rely on Allah, and seek Him to give you strength.

May Allah give us All that is good for us, make it easy for us to obtain it and keep us on the straight path when we do.


References:
Qur'an translation by Yusuf Ali
"Women in the Qur'an, Traditions and Interpretation" by Barbara Freyer Stowasser ISBN 0-19-508480-2

~*~The Great Virtue of Lowering the Gaze ~*~

 

Allaah, the Exalted said,

“Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their private parts; that will make for greater purity for them. Indeed Allaah is well acquainted with all that they do.” [an-Nur (24):30]
So Allaah made purification and spiritual growth to be the outcome of lowering the gaze and guarding the private parts. It is for this reason that lowrering ones gaze from (seeing) the prohibited things necessarily leads to three benefits that carry tremendous value and are of great significance.
The First: experiencing the delight and sweetness of faith.
This delight and sweetness is far greater and more desirable that which might have been attained from the object that one lowered his gaze from for the sake of Allaah. Indeed, “whosoever leaves something for the sake of Allaah then Allaah, the Mighty and Magnificent, will replace it with something better than it.” {1}
The soul is a temptress and loves to look at beautiful forms and the eye is the guide of the heart. The heart commissions its guide to go and look to see what is there and when the eye informs it of a beautiful image it shudders out of love and desire for it. Frequently such inter-relations tire and wear down both the heart and the eye as is said:
When you sent your eye as a guide
for your heart one day, the object of sight fatigued you,
For you saw one over whom you had no power,
Neither a portion or in totality; instead you had to be patient.
Therefore when the sight is prevented from looking and investigating the heart finds relief from having to go through the arduous task of (vainly) seeking and desiring.
Whosoever lets his sight roam free will find that he is in a perpetual state of loss and anguish for sight gives birth to love (mahabbah) the starting point of which is the heart being devoted and dependant upon that which it beholds. This then intensifies to become fervent longing (sabaabah) whereby the heart becomes totally dependant and devoted to the (object of its desire). Then this further intensifies and becomes infatuation (gharaamah) which clings to the heart like the one seeking repayment of a debt clings firmly to the one who has to pay the debt. Then this intensifies and becomes passionate love (ishk) and this is a love that transgresses all bounds. Then this further intensifies and becomes crazed passion (shaghafa) and this a love that encompasses every tiny part of the heart. Then this intensifies and becomes worshipful love (tatayyuma). Tatayyum means worship and it is said: tayyama Allaah i.e. he worshipped Allaah.
Hence the heart begins to worship that which is not correct for it to worship and the reason behind all of this was an illegal glance. The heart is now bound in chains whereas before it used to be the master, it is now imprisoned whereas before it was free. It has been oppressed by the eye and it complains to it upon which the eye replies: I am your guide and messenger and it was you who sent me in the first place!
All that has been mentioned applies to the heart that has relinquished the love of Allaah and being sincere to Him for indeed the heart must have an object of love that it devotes itself to. Therefore when the heart does not love Allaah Alone and does not take Him as its God then it must worship something else.
Allaah said concerning Yusuf as-Siddeeq (AS),
“Thus (did We order) so that We might turn away from him all evil and indecent actions for he was one of Our sincere servants.” [Yusuf (12): 24]
It was because the wife of al-Azeez was a polytheist that (the passionate love) entered her heart despite her being married. It was because Yusuf (AS) was sincere to Allaah that he was saved from it despite his being a young man, unamarried and a servant.
The Second: the illumination of the heart, clear perception and penetrating insight.
Ibn Shujaa` al-Kirmaanee said, “whosoever builds his outward form upon following the Sunnah, his internal form upon perpetual contemplation and awareness of Allaah, he restrains his soul from following desires, he lowers his gaze from the forbidden things and he always eats the lawful things then his perception and insight shall never be wrong.”
Allaah mentioned the people of Lut and what they were afflicted with and then He went on to say,
“Indeed in this are signs for the Mutawassimeen.” [al-Hijr (15): 75]
The Mutwassimeen are those who have clear perception and penetrating insight, those who are secure from looking at the unlawful and performing indecent acts.
Allaah said after mentioning the verse concerning lowering the gaze,
“Allaah is the Light of the heavens and the earth.” [an-Nur (24): 35]
The reason behind this is that the reward is of the same type as the action. So whosoever lowers his gaze from the unlawful for the sake of Allaah, the Mighty and Magnificent, He will replace it with something better than it of the same type. So just as the servant restrained the light of his eye from falling upon the unlawful, Allaah blesses the light of his sight and heart thereby making him perceive what he would not have seen and understood had he not lowered his gaze.
This is a matter that the person can physically sense in himself for the heart is like a mirror and the base desires are like rust upon it. When the mirror is polished and cleaned of the rust then it will reflect the realities (haqaa`iq) as they actually are. However if it remains rusty then it will not reflect properly and therefore its knowledge and speech will arise from conjecture and doubt.
The Third: the heart becoming strong, firm and courageous.
Allaah will give it the might of aid for its strength just as He gave it the might of clear proofs for its light. Hence the heart shall combine both of these factors and as a result, Shaytaan shall flee from it. It is mentioned in the narration, “whosoever opposes his base desires, the Shaytaan shall flee in terror from his shade.” {2}
This is why the one who follows his base desires shall find in himself the ignominy of the soul, its being weak, feeble and contemptible. Indeed Allaah places nobilty for the one who obeys Him and disgrace for the one who disobeys Him,
"So do not lose heart nor fall into despair; for you must gain mastery if you are true in faith.” [Aali Imraan(3): 139]
“If any do seek for nobilty and power then to Allaah belongs all nobility and power.” [Faatir(35): 10]
Meaning that whosoever seeks after disobedience and sin then Allaah, the Might and Magnificent, will humiliate the one who disobeys Him.
Some of the salaf said, “the people seek nobilty and power at the door of the Kings and they will not find it except through the obedience of Allaah.”
This is because the one who who obeys Allaah has taken Allaah as his friend and protector and Allaah will never humiliate the one who takes his Lord as friend and patron. In the Du`aa Qunut their occurs, “the one who You take as a friend is not humiliated and the one who You take as an enemy is not ennobled.” {3}

By Imaam ibn al-Qayyim
Taken from ‘al-Muntaqaa min Ighaathatul Lufhaan fee Masaayid ash-Shaytaan’ [pp.’s 102-105] of ibn al-Qayyim, summarised by Alee Hasan

~*~Don't Look Down While Thinking About Wearing Hijab, Just Jump and Allah Will Cach you.! ~*~

 

 

Don't Look Down

Making the Decision to Wear Hejab 

By Shaden Mohamed


My decision to wear the hijab was sudden, yet expected. I had been thinking about it for a few months, but never actually worked up the courage to take the leap of faith (so to speak). I always made excuses - my career, my friends, my wardrobe! All of which were validated by my peers, who reassured me and others that the hejab was a personal choice made only when we as women were ready for it.
Well what the heck does that mean?! When would I be ready? When I lost my career, friends and fashion sense?! No sir-ee-bob, this issue needed more thought than I was giving it, and even that was a hard thing to do with everything that was taking place in my life.
And so in time all thought of wearing the hejab dissolved and I went about preparing for my holiday to Thailand over the Xmas break.
I know what most people are thinking - and no, I did not have a near-death experience which made me want to wear the hejab and give up cargo shorts forever.
Actually I was in Bangkok at the time of the wave, which I had escaped when I left Phuket 2 days earlier. Apart from a tremor in my hotel, and running down 31 levels to safety, I was safe and sound in Sydney just in time to celebrate new year's eve with some friends and to recuperate before starting work again in a few days time.
And so my time away from home was perhaps what made my decision more premeditated than I had thought.
Away from all pressures and influences, with only time to dwell on my own thoughts, I thought about what I wanted in life. And I succeeded in coming home with 5% more knowledge about myself.
Part of that was releasing the anxiety that was caused by my environment. I thought "Stuff it, I'm doing what I want and dealing with the circumstances as they arise" (by the way, I am yet to face any "circumstances" - the only thing I was truly worried about was my own self-image.
No one will ever say: "Oh my God what have you done! You will be an outcast forever!" the only person who ever came close to saying that aloud was me).
After all, with more and more women becoming more dedicated to Islam, if I had waited any longer I would have been the outcast. So to all you women out there, "thinking" about your hijab options - don't look down, just jump and Allah will catch you.

Shaden Mohamed is in her 20's. Of Egyptian background, she was born and bred in Sydney, Australia, where she attained a degree in Media & Communications. 

~*~ Why Precious Muslimah Cry? ~*~


A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?"
"Because I need to" she said.
"I don't understand," he said.
His mother just hugged him and said, "And you never will."
Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"
"All women cry for no reason," his dad answered carelessly.
The little boy, still wondering why women cry, finally asked the old wise shaikh (scholar). "He surely knows the answer", he thought.
"Ya Shaikh! Why do women cry so easily?"
The Shaikh answered:
"When Allah made the woman she had to be special. He made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.
He gave an inner strength to endure both childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.
He gave her a toughness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.
He gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child hurts her badly.
He gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart. He gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.
And lastly, He gave her a tear. This is hers and only hers exclusively to use whenever she needs it. She needs no reason, no explanation, its hers.
You see my son, the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the beauty of her face, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

Friday

~*~ Secret of Precious Muslimah ~*~



One day, one friend asked another,
"How is it that you are always so happy?
You have so much energy,
and you never seem to get down."

With her eyes smiling, she said,
"I know the Secret!"
"What secret is that?"
To which she replied,
"I'll tell you all about it,
but you have to promise to
share the Secret with others."

"The Secret is this:
I have learned there is little I can do
in my life that will make me truly happy..
I must depend on ALLAH Ta'Aala to make
me happy and to meet my needs.
When a need arises in my life,
I have to trust ALLAH Ta'Aala to supply
according to HIS riches.
I have learned most of the time
I don't need half of what I think I do.
He has never let me down.
Since I learned that 'Secret', I am happy."

The questioner's first thought was,
"That's too simple!"
But upon reflecting over her own life
she recalled how she thought a bigger house
would make her happy, but it didn't!
She thought a better paying job
would make her happy, but it hadn't.
When did she realize her greatest happiness?
Sitting on the floor with her grandchildren,
playing games, eating pizza or reading a story,
a simple gift from ALLAH Ta'Aala.

Now you know it too!
We can't depend on people to make us happy.
Only ALLAH Ta'Aala in His infinite wisdom can do that.
Trust ALLAH Ta'Aala!
And now I pass the Secret on to you!
So once you get it, what will you do?

 

YOU have to tell someone the Secret, too!
That ALLAH Ta'Aala in His wisdom will take care of YOU!
But it's not really a secret...
We just have to believe it and do it...
Really trust ALLAH Ta'Aala! 



~*~ Motherhood in Al-Quran ~*~



The cases of the Mothers as mentioned in Qur'an are always accompanied by a sense of testing, challenge, anguish and for each one of these cases there are a good reason lies behind.

Mother of Musa Alayhis 'Salam

Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala told the Mother of Hazrat Musa alayhis 'salam ( through inspiration to do this unbelievable, challenging, trying and testing act that is to place her newborn son in the chest and throw it into the river to be picked up by one who is an enemy of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala and an enemy of Hazrat Musa alayhis 'salam. How much faith and comfort a mother would have to respond to this call from Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala to throw her son and some people say that after all she did not have a choice because Pharaoh is killing the sons.

Nonetheless it is quite difficult to convince a mother to throw her son to the unknown like that. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala did not say that her son will be taken to safety and instead He said the baby will be picked up by one who is an enemy of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala and an enemy of Musa alayhis 'salam. It must have been a very strong and faithful mother.


Mother of Hazrat Yahya Alayhis 'Salam

Hazrat Yahya alayhis 'salam's father Hazrat Zakariya alayhis 'salam was an old man and there was a need for an heir to carry the legacy of the message. Hazrat Zakariya alayhis 'salam's wife was also old. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala wanted him to have a very special child (Qur'an 19:7-11). We know that Hazrat Yahya alayhis 'salam played an important role in the chain of messengers because he was the one who conveyed the message and also who took care of Hazrat Isa alayhis 'salam.

The trial is not to Hazrat Zakariya alayhis 'salam but to his wife, the old woman who has to go through the tribulations to having that child. Nonetheless the father was sceptical of having a child in the old age but on the contrary the mother was joyful and cheerful about that situation and she came laughing aloud. (Qur'an 51:29)

She just had a positive attitude about the whole thing and cheerfulness that she could not hide even though it was a strange situation to be at.

Mother of Hazrat Isa Alayhis 'Salam

Hazrat Maryam Radi Allahu anha's trial was also very strange. Hazrat Maryam Radi Allahu anha a chaste and a respectful person of the society finds all of a sudden that she will have a baby. She seeks refuge in Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala to protect her. She was wondering how she can have a child affirming her chastity. Qur'an explains the miraculous conception. In the pain of labour, Hazrat Maryam Radi Allahu anha wishes that she would rather die than go through this. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala comforts and guides her. (Qur'an 19:16-25)

She delivers the baby and goes back to her people. Her people immediately remind her about her pious and respectful family. And Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala made the newborn defend her mother. Hazrat Isa alayhis 'salam said he is NOT the son of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala but the servant of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala. And Hazrat Isa alayhis 'salam said he will be kind to his mother. (Quran 19:26-35)

We can see the gratitude he had towards his mother who went through all these trials.

Foster Mother

Pharaoh's (Firaun) wife prays to Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala that she needs a house in the heaven and she wants Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala to save her from Pharaoh (Firaun) and his doings and from those who do wrong. (Qur'an 66:11)

One can appreciate her good attitude when she finds the baby [Musa alayhis 'salam] inside the chest. She says that the baby is a pleasure to her eyes and her mother's instinct starts taking over. She says to Pharaoh (Firaun) not to kill the baby and says the baby might be of benefit to them. Here is the mother's instinct that is saying that they will adopt him as a son. (Qur'an 28:9)

Kindness to Mother

Qur'an ordains to be kind to one's parents and especially to the mother (Qur'an 31:14, 46:15). All the family and relationships mentioned in the Qur'an refers to the womb (rahim). Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala instructs not to break the ties of the womb when put in authority (Qur'an 47:22).

Motherhood in Modern times

For the first time in the history, motherhood has become a matter of question. Throughout the history from Hazrat Adam alayhis 'salam and Hazrat Hawa Radi Allahu anha and up until now the motherhood was never questioned. The mother gets pregnant, delivers a baby and she is the mother of the child.

So each mother is carrying in her the parts of the original material that made her child. Hence with the advent of modern science the mother-child relationship is much more than what we had ever known before. This probably explains the Hadith of the Prophet Muhammad Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam when a man came to him and he was asked, Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam said: Your mother. The man said, 'Then who?' The Prophet Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam said: Then your mother. The man further asked, 'Then who?' The Prophet Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam said: Then your mother. The man asked again, 'Then who?' The Prophet Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam said: Then your father (Bukhari). 






Thursday

~*~ Precious Muslimah's Right to Work ~*~


Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala created all mankind from a single male and female, and placed natural love and affection for one another in order that they cooperate to build families and relationships of families. We see in nature that Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala bestowed the male of each species with superior power and endurance in order that he may dominate in certain spheres and seek provisions and protection for the species, while the female of each species is equipped to reproduce and multiply to maintain the continuity of that species. Only the female is equipped with the necessary apparatus to bear, deliver, nurse and care for the young. The female human has been endowed with love, kindness, sympathy, care and affection in order to carry out her duties to her children with dignity. Based on this natural predisposition and delegation of responsibilities, and based on the unique qualities of the male and the female, it is only natural for man to work outside the house and earn for the sustenance of the family and for the woman to work inside the house and take care of the children and the family in general.

Considering this basic fact, Islamic law does not deprive a woman from the right to work within the limits that protect her honor and dignity. Islam permits the woman to personally conduct her business contracts and financial transactions. All such contracts and transactions are sound and valid in the view of Islamic jurisprudence. There are certain set conditions which if violated, the permission given to the woman to practice this right will be rendered void and she can be restrained from the use of her right.

The work that the women engage outside the home must not conflict with her duties and responsibilities to her husband and children. Her work must be with other women and free of intermingling in a male environment, where she comes into physical contact with men, or is confined and exposed to molestation and abuse. 
As the Messenger of Allah said (Peace be upon Him):

"A man is not secluded with a woman, but that the Satan is the third party to them."[Tirmidhi #1171]
And in another tradition,

A man said: "O Messenger of Allah my wife has gone out to go for Pilgrimage and I have been written to go for a military campaign."
He said: "Go and make Pilgrimage with your wife."

[Bukhari #4935 & Muslim #1341 ]

Lady Cook, the well-known English writer says in New Echo:

"Men like (and prefer) the mixed environment. Thus, women are lured to something that conflicts with their human nature. The greater the co-ed. environment (between male and female), the more illegitimate children the society will have. There is the greatest disaster..." 
The work that the woman performs outside her home must be, in the first place, a lawful employment or job that suits the nature and physique of the woman. She must not, for instance, be obliged to do heavy industrial jobs, and other jobs to which men are more suited to perform.
The question that poses itself here is: Why does the woman have to work in the first place? 
If a woman is working to earn her own living expenses, Islam has absolved her from this duty by obliging, as mentioned earlier, the male family members to take care of the entire financial needs and obligations. Thus from her birth to death, throughout the various stages of her entire life, she is not required to work to give utmost dignity and concentration to her paramount mission and duty of taking care of the home and raising the children. This honorable mission requires great sacrifices and devotion, and has the highest status. 
The well-known English scholar Samuel Smiles, one of the pillars of the English renaissance says:

"The system that has required women to work in factories and industrial areas, regardless of the national wealth it brings, has destroyed the family life. It has attacked, in fact, the basic structure and foundations of the home and destroyed the essential pillars of the family. It has cut and destroyed social ties as well. Stripping the wife from her husband, and depriving children of their rights of proper, tender and maternal care, has resulted in lower moral values for the women. The real job and profession of a woman is to raise a good, sound and moral family. She is mainly required to take care of household responsibilities, home economics and other domestic needs. Work in factories has stripped the woman, as we pointed earlier, of all these responsibilities which changed the looks and the realities of the inner home. Children, as well, were often neglected and raised with no sound standards. The love and affection between husband and wife were somewhat extinguished. The woman was no longer the sought, wanted, admired and loved by man, after he got used to seeing her in the factory next to him doing the same thing he does. Woman came under many influences and pressures that changed her mentality and thinking pattern on which moral values and virtues were established.

In fact, the First Lady of South Africa calls for the return of woman to the home saying:

"The most natural place for a woman is her own home. The main task and responsibility for a woman must be to care for her husband and attend to the needs of her children."

She also said in an address to a women's conference in the capital of South Africa:

"The main task and responsibility for a woman must be to care for her husband and attend to the needs of her children. This is our duty in the society. It is a duty in which we should take special pride as it produces successful men and sound generations."




~*~ Wife Discipline ~*~



 



 
Allah, the Exalted, stated in the Glorious Qur'an:

(... As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next,) refuse to share their beds, (and last,) beat them (lightly, if it is useful). But if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Most High, Most Great.)[4:34]

Islam forbids beating women and warns strictly against it.



The Prophet (Peace be upon Him) never beat any of his wives or servants, as his wife Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported in an authentic tradition (Bukhari #2328).  


 
Women are, in general, weaker than men in their physique and stamina. Women are often unable to defend themselves against violence. Although beating of women is generally forbidden, Islam permits the beating of wives in a restricted and limited sense only as a final solution and acceptable valid reason when all else fails. This is analogous to spanking children when all else fails and they must learn a lesson in obedience for their own protection and success. 
In the verse we quoted, Allah deals with the case of a wife who behaves immorally towards her husband's rights. The treatment of this extremely sensitive issue comes in gradual stages, as we have noticed from the verse. Medicine, or treatment of any ailment, can be very bitter at times. But an ill person will take the remedy gladly and bear the bitterness of the medicine in order to be cured from his illness.  
The remedy to treat a wife blameworthy of immoral behavior, as we have noticed, comes in three gradual stages:

1. First stage: The stage of advice, counseling and warning against Allah's punishment. A husband must remind his wife of the importance of protecting his rights in Islam. This stage is a very kind and easy one. But, if this treatment does not work and proves to be ineffective, then the husband may resort to the next stage.

2. Second stage: To leave the wife's bed. Or, if one sleeps in the same bed with her, he will turn his back to her, not touch her, talk to her or have intercourse with her. This stage, as noticed, combines both strictness and kindness, although it is a very harsh practice on both. But, if this treatment does not work, then the husband may resort to the final stage of discipline explained below.

3. Third and final stage: Beating without hurting, breaking a bone, leaving black or blue marks on the body, and avoiding hitting the face or especially sensitive places at any cost. The purpose of beating her is only to discipline and never retaliation or with desire to hurt by any means. Islam forbids severe beating as punishment.
 
The Prophet (Peace be upon Him) said:

"None of you should beat his wife like a slave-beating and then have intercourse with her at the end of the day". [Bukhari #4908]

This treatment is proved to be very effective with two types of women, as psychologists have determined:

The first type: Strong willed, demanding and commandeering women. These are the type of women who like to control, master and run the affairs of their husbands by pushing them around, commanding them and giving them orders. 
 
The second type: Submissive or subdued women. These women may even enjoy being beaten at times as a sign of love and concern.

G. A. Holdfield, a European psychologist, in his book Psychology and Morals states the following:

"The instinct of submission strengthens at times, in the human being so much that a submissive person will enjoy seeing someone overpowering him, over-ruling him and being cruel to him. Such a submissive person bears the consequences of his submission due to the fact that he enjoys the pain. This is a wide spread instinct amongst women, even if they do not realize it. For this very reason, women are well known for bearing more pain than men. A wife, from this type of women, becomes more attracted and admiring of her husband when he beats her. Nothing, on the other hand, will sadden some women, as much as a soft, very kind and very obedient husband who is never upset regardless of being challenged!" 
Beating, according to the Islamic teachings, is listed as the last and final stage of disciplining methods. Islam does not permit, allow or even condone beating unless the first two stages are proven to be ineffective. Moreover, beating must not be employed as a remedy, if a wife prefers to be divorced.
The three stages of discipline stated in the verse of the Glorious Qur'an are only meant to be a means of discipline for the protection of the family unit. One form of destruction of a family is when the wife becomes a victim of divorce. Islam aims to relieve unnecessary pains, problems and conflicts.
The practice of beating wives is in other non-Muslim societies is far more brutal and frequent. Wife beatings in theses societies are often with intent to inflict pain and harm to the wife; something strictly prohibited in Islam as mentioned previously. Recent statistics show that in Britain, the number of wives who have been brutally beaten by their husbands has risen from 6,400 in 1990 to 30,000 in 1992. This number jumped to 65,400 women in 1995. Statisticians expect this number to double 124,400 towards the end of the twentieth century! These statistics, as the report says, were based on information gathered from the police department. But, what about the unreported cases of wife beating, and the beating of women in general, which are not reported!

Mrs. Annie Besant compared Islamic Laws and Western legislation on women's rights and said:

"Islamic Laws are among the best laws known to the world, insofar as woman is concerned. It is the most fair and just legislation. It exceeds the Western legislation concerning real estate, inheritance and divorce laws. It acts as a guardian for women's rights. Phrases such as One Wife is Sufficient for a man, and Polygamy, mystified people and turned them away from the real misery which Western women suffer from and live through. Many husbands left their wives after they got what they wanted from them. In fact such men show no care, concern or mercy for their wives."




Tuesday

~*~Precious Muslimah's roles for islam in the west~*~


Dear sisters,  
We are indeed privileged to be a part of the community of Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) because we have been blessed with such a Prophet who has a profound and sincere love for his Ummah. Everything that the Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) did and thought about, are merely for the sake of his Ummah, to the extent that he does not wish for any single one of us to fall into the pits of the Hellfire. 

Allah Subhanahu wa Tala Said  in surah At-Taubah verse 128:

“Indeed, there has come unto you a Messenger from amongst yourselves: it grieves him that you should perish: ardently anxious is he over you: to the Believers is he most kind and merciful.” 


 Through the above verse (Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala) shows our beloved Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam)'s love for his Ummah.

As ummah we are also responsible for contributing to Islamic work in the west just as brothers. There are a number of things that can be done on a personal, family and community level by our sisters.


1. Remember you are a khalifa on earth
 Both men and women are appointed by Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) as His khalifa (trustees) on earth (Qur'an 33:72-73). We have been given this amana (trust) from Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala), and it is our responsibility to care for it. We must not forget that we will all be asked on the Day of Judgement

as The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A servant of God will remain standing on the Day of Judgment until he is questioned about his (time on earth) and how he used it; about his knowledge and how he utilized it; about his wealth and from where he acquired it and in what (activities) he spent it; and about his body and how he used it." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 148
 
How did we spend our time, wealth, health, knowledge and other resources Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) has entrusted to us as a gift. How have we tried to make our ummah stronger? Will we make the grade?


2. Make your intention for the sake of Allah
 So where does success really come from? It's from Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala). But without the correct intentions and methods, we won't achieve success.

Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) said "Actions are but by intentions" - Bukhari and Muslim.

Make your intention to please Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) first and foremost. This is the first and most important thing no matter what type of activism you get involved in.


Umar bin al-Khattaab relates that: ‘I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, saying, “verily actions are by intentions, and for every person is what he intended. So the one whose hijra was to Allaah and His Messenger, then his hijrah was to Allaah and His Messenger. And the one whose hijrah was for the world to gain from it, or a woman to marry her, then his hijrah was to what he made hijrah for.” Related by Bukhaaree and Muslim.

And Imaam Bukhaaree commences his Saheeh with this hadeeth and gives it the place of an opening lecture from him thereby indicating that every action that is done not desiring the Face of Allaah is invalid bearing no fruits in this world and in the Hereafter. Therefore be sure of your action and act accordingly and start your action with a beautiful clear intention.



3. Make Du'a (supplication)
Dua is the best gift we can give to ummah. There are dua's to make such as 
 "Allahummaghfirli waliwalidaiyya wali jami'il mu'minina walmu'minati wal-musliminawal-muslimati birahmatika ya arhamurrahimin." - O Allah, forgive me and my parents and all the believing men and women and all Muslim men and women with Your mercy. O Most Merciful of all who have mercy.
 Make dua for the ummah and for yourself and ask Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) for Guidance, understanding, and a straight intention. Ask Him to accept your efforts for His cause. Then watch as Insha Allah, He helps you throughout your work for His Cause.

4. Seek knowledge, a path to Paradise and power
  You have made your intention clear, now what is next? How do you know what the right method is to contribute to Islam in West? The answer is knowledge. Specifically, knowledge of the Qur'an and Sunnah. 


The Prophet (Sallalahu Alaihi Wasallam )said "For him who follows a path for seeking knowledge, (Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala) will ease for him the path to Paradise" - Muslim.


 Read Quran with translation and with tafseer in the language you are most comfortable with. This will make the concept clear and give you better understanding. And giving dawah through Quran will be easy for you Inshallah.

 Read hadith with commentary for better understanding. Remember, It’s hard to memorize all the hadiths about our life aspects. So before explaining a hadith to someone simply say "more or less Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) said in hadith....". Otherwise if we want to say a hadith but have changed a word or two while giving dawah, we will be sinful (unless we perfectly memorize them).

Remember that your goal as an ordinary Muslim at this point, is not to "reinterpret" the Qur'an or Hadith. It is simply to expose yourself to Allah's Message in a way that you can understand.


5. Learn about your rights and duties and change who you are accordingly
  Remember that the meaning of knowledge is not something that you learn and store in your brain. 


As The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) also said: "Knowledge from which no benefit is derived is like a treasure out of which nothing is spent in the cause of God." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 108
 

 It is something that you learn and implement in your life.  If we want to work for Islam in the West or anywhere else, we've got to start with ourselves first. We must work from the inside out. We must fix our character first, then work with our families, neighbourhood and further out within the community.

Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala ordained us:
 The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) also said: "Acquire knowledge and impart it to the people." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 107
 
And when we use this knowledge to give dawah The reward from  Allah Subhanahu Wa Tala :


The Prophet Muhammad ((Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam)) said: "God, His angels and all those in Heavens and on Earth, even ants in their hills and fish in the water, call down blessings on those who instruct others in beneficial knowledge." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 422


The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "If anyone travels on a road in search of knowledge, God will cause him to travel on one of the roads of Paradise. The angels will lower their wings in their great pleasure with one who seeks knowledge. The inhabitants of the heavens and the Earth and (even) the fish in the deep waters will ask forgiveness for the learned man. The superiority of the learned over the devout is like that of the moon, on the night when it is full, over the rest of the stars. The learned are the heirs of the Prophets, and the Prophets leave (no monetary inheritance), they leave only knowledge, and he who takes it takes an abundant portion. - Sunan of Abu-Dawood, Hadith 1631      


6. Raise good Muslim sons and daughters
 While talking of Muslim women going out to change the world, we tend to forget about the one place where women have the most control: as mothers. Use this super-power. J

It's mothers who can perpetuate notions of what a woman's place is, and they also can perpetuate a lot of the misguided notions about the position of women in Islam. Think through what messages you are giving your children. For example,
- Are the mothers teaching their children the sunnah in dailiy life, insisting them to read Quran or Pray on time? 
- Beating or scolding if the kids do not pray salat at the age of seven onwards or if they are being rude to parents or being un-islamic? 
-Are the mothers teaching kids good manners according to islam?
- How many mothers spoil their sons by not insisting they clean up their own room, put away their own dishes after dinner, help clean up the house or fold the laundry or not to watch TV excessively? 
 Mothers can and should challenge gender stereotypes in their own homes. This may be considered a small step for mums, but it leads to big steps for Muslim ummah. Remember while upbringing children, Just as the children has rights and responsibilities toward parents, parents also have rights and responsibilities to educate children islamicly.


7. Speak out against injustice
 The western societies today are abusing muslims because they do not have proper knowledge of islam, So speak up sisters! Use your knowledge of the Quran and Sunnah to challenge gender-unfriendly spaces and positions in the Muslim community. Just because we muslim women don't speak up, we are letting the wrongdoer do more wrong, more abuse to islam and women. Non-muslim people in the west thinks that muslim women are scared to speak up because of super controlling muslim men, women are scared to open up and show hair or expose themselves because of their controlling men (husband/father/brother). Using your knowledge of Quran and sunnah, speak up and tell them they are wrong. Open up their eyes and beliefs about islam. Let them know whatever we are doing this is merely the order of our God - Almighty Allah!

And don't just speak out against the bad. Ask questions and comment with wisdom as well.


8. Don't underestimate the power of social activities
 Do you think organizing social activities such as dinners for sisters is just a waste of time? Not if you know the reality of the Muslim community here in the West.

While many sisters have families they can easily turn to for company and support, there are many who don't. Our communities have plenty of sisters who are new to Islam, or sisters who are students from abroad, or who recently immigrated here with their families but who are hungry for companionship.
What better companionship than that of Muslim sisters for the sake of Allah?

Organizing weekly dinners, teas, Halaqas are all small practical steps that Muslim sisters can take to help each other not only cope with loneliness, but more importantly become closer to Allah, if He wills. This creates a much-needed social network.

9. Go into professions that are needed in the community
 Often, we encourage our children to go into professions that are seen as prestigious or that will ensure them financial security. These may not, however, be professions that are most needed by the Muslim community. Identify what the needs are and encourage young women to pursue careers in these fields.

For example, there is dire need for Muslim community advocates, social workers, therapists, family counsellors, doctors, psychologists and other support resources. The shortage of such professional skills within the community forces Muslims to go to non-Muslims who are often insensitive to our religious values.

Another field where Muslim women are needed is law. Marriage, divorce, custody of children, and inheritance are all issues which directly affect Muslim women, and for which they will rarely find a Muslim advocate. There is a need for sisters who know Islamic law and the local law to help Muslim women deal with issues like these with sincere, sound advice, as well as sympathetic support.

Is there a Muslim woman doctor in the house? For the most part, the answer is no. It is no cliché to say that there is a crying need for women in the medical field. Sisters are especially needed in sensitive fields like obstetrics and gynecology, fertiltiy specialists, etc.

These are among many areas where women, especially Muslim ones, feel most comfortable discussing exclusively with other women who will understand where they are coming from.

10. Teach in Islamic weekend schools
 
Does getting an education degree sound too far-fetched? If so, consider helping Islam in America by teaching at the local Islamic weekend school. This is where a number of Muslim kids (most of whom attend public school) find their only Islamic environment throughout the whole week.

The presence Muslim sisters as mentioned above, is not just in imparting knowledge but it's also in being a positive role model.
As well, teaching in Islamic weekend schools provides you with the opportunity to clarify the position of women in Islam, to clear it of the cultural baggage so many Muslim parents tend to pass down to their kids.

11. Enjoin the good and forbid the evil


 The Prophet (Sallalahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) said: If one of you sees something evil he should change it with his hand. If he cannot, he should speak out against it, and if he cannot do even that he should at least detest it in his heart, this being the weakest form of faith.
[Muslim]

It is a responsibility of both men and women to enjoin good and forbid evil. Look for opportunities and build your strength to do this. If you can’t do anything, do detest it in your heart and ask Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) to refrain them from such sinful act and give them hidayah.

By speaking out against the wrong, not only will you be fulfilling a religious duty, but you will become stronger and Allah willing, gain the strength to speak out against wrong regardless who is doing the wrong.

12. Promote and appreciate sisters doing good work
 How many of us spend time to appreciate the work Muslims sisters do to promote the cause of Islam?

For example in  Facebook /Twitter, sisters has given an inspiring speech, written a useful article, established a fantastic events for sisters to attend, create groups/pages to promote/give dawah of islam. Some sisters also create islamic blogs or forum or websites to give dawah. Appreciate their noble acts.

Promoting and appreciating sisters who are doing good work will not only serve as encouragement for them, it will also pinpoint acceptable role models for young Muslim women. This is important when many or our young girls look up to women who are models, actresses and singers, as opposed to those making a positive contribution to society.

13. Support other sisters in need or difficulty
 Everyone has problems but some hides it better than others, some suffers physical illness, some are mentally depressed, some are distressed, some are in need to food/cloth, some are struggling to pray salat or to read Al-Quran, some are in financial trouble. Do not belittle anyone for whatever trouble they are in. Fear Allah ( subhanahu Wa Tala)’s wrath when you ignore or belittle one person

Remember we have no power to solve anyone’s problems. Problems come from Allah (Subhanahu Wa Tala) and He is only Powerful one who can take it away. We can only be the means of one’s relief. All we need to do is to visit them in times of need or make a simple phone call or write an inspiring letter/e-mail to them and console them with your knowledge from Quran and Sunnah.

You must be inspired by this:

Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) said: If anyone calls on a sick, a caller calls from the Heaven “You are good and also your walking is good. You have built your house in Paradise. – Trimizi, Ibn Maaja

Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) said that when a muslim goes to visit on ailing muslim brothers, he is separated from Hell to the distance of seventy year’s journey. – Abu Daud

Are you inspired or motivated? Or you are thinking “ I should do such noble act but I don’t have time to visit the distress, because I am too busy with my kids or with family/friends or with job or with party”?
Don’t worry – here is a simple solution:
Sheikhs said even if you can give them a call, or send them email/sms and say encouraging words/advices, Quranic Ayahs, hadith on patience and hardships etc. your effort will bring you the same reward as above mentioned hadith.

14. Get sympathetic speakers and scholars invited to the community
 Find out who are the top speakers in your community? What is their understanding of Islam and especially the role of women?
Sisters can encourage community leaders to invite speakers to shed light on Muslim women's issues, and who can address problems from an Islamic perspective in a wise and sensitive way. Organize an event either at community centers or at your house for the scholars to give speech and invite sisters.

15. Teach sisters how to deal with discrimination
 How many sisters know how to respond effectively to discrimination and harassment? It seems that most will tend to ignore it. Others may respond with a rude remark of their own. But neither of these approaches is usually appropriate.

Muslim women can help here by developing an effective strategy in consultation with Imams and community leaders. Informing and enabling Muslim women on how to seek legal recourse if they so choose is another needed service.

16. Become journalists and media professionals
 Do you think the ability to write well and communicate effectively has no effect on others?
You're wrong. A knowledgeable, practicing Muslim woman who can write and speak well is a powerful weapon against those who say Islam oppresses women, or that women can't come to the mosque for instance.

The media is an unavoidable tool in the spread of Islam amongst Muslims and non-Muslims and sisters should not avoid this field of study.

17. Use what you have
 If you're already a working Muslim woman, how can you contribute without necessarily changing careers? Use your professional skills for the community.

If you can write well, establish a well-written, organized and attractive community newsletter. If you're in business, establish a community fundraising project for the local mosque's expansion. Use what you've got. It'll take some thinking and planning, but you're almost bound to find a way you can contribute, if Allah wills.

18. Know and teach women's history
 Do you think women's history means learning exclusively about Western feminists? Think again. Muslim women have their own heroes. Aisha, Khadijah, Maryam, Asiya (may Allah be pleased with all of them) are our role models. Remember that Muslim women's history does not start and end with these four righteous women. Muslim history is full of women who have made positive contributions. We also need to recognize and know the efforts of the pioneering Muslim women who came to North America and worked in partnership with men to establish the various Muslim institutions now flourishing in the West.

Know the history of the first generation of Muslim women as well as those who established the Muslim community in the West and the rest of the world.

Read to your daughters the stories of the great female companions of the Prophet in books like Abdul Wahid Hamid's Companions of the Prophet.

19. Understand the issues of the day
 Do you know what your kids are learning in school? Is there a sex education class promoting unIslamic ideas? What are you going to do about it? Do you participate in your child's Earth Day activities at school?

Muslims sisters have to know the issues of the day in order to make an impact. Whether it's sex education, drunk driving or rape these and other issues should be of concern to us as well, and not just non-Muslims. Being vocal, and most importantly, knowing and advocating the Islamic position on issues of the day affords you the opportunity to stand up for justice and to make Da'wah. Don't pass it up.

20. Volunteer!
 There are many organisations and businesses - both Muslim and non-Muslim, which are in need of people who can spare a few hours a day, week or month.
Charities, masjids, and play groups are some to name a few. This is an excellent opportunity for Muslimahs to benefit and aid the community as well as gain the blessings from the Lord of all the Worlds.